Interpretation of my Mimpi

I asked my 2nd boss about my hantu keliwon dream since he likes to interpret dreams and all. His prediction:



"The hantu thingy is your ego. You are embracing your ego too much hence the 'muka bangga'. Until and unless you let go your ego, you'll never find your happiness,"



Perlu ke ego aku in a form of hantu keliwon?!!! Huduh benau!!!

Happy NOT meant anni babe... *blow candles*

You said you'll always be there if I needed a shoulder to cry on.


But what if YOU are the reason I'm crying?







Shucks!

Nak mengamoknyaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I'm upset today. My mood is like, gilaaaaaaa macam puting beliung. It seems like the hatred in me today just decides to take charge of my whole being and hate everybody. Like, REAAALLLYYYY menyampah nak mampos dengan semua orang.


When Chief came in this morning and simply said good morning, I felt like throwing up. Just now, Chief accidently terpijak my shoe, I seriously felt like haaaiiiyaaaakkkkkkk berani kau pijak kasut aku syaitaaaannnnnnnnn!!!! Then, the 2nd Boss came in. All he did was smiled, decent smile you know, but it was enough to make me felt so blardy sick. When everybody else started to make that small talk over morning coffee, I felt like strangling them with my own bare hands.


And when the accounts started giving me dead end, I threw the file away. Where did my level of patience go? Nipis benau tahap kesabaran aku ari ni. I know this is not PMS because I had my menses like 2 weeks ago. Why the heck am I being so worked up today?


You.


When you are feeling better, please pay me a visit. I feel like hitting somebody and you are like, my perfect punching bag.


Bole?


*buat senyuman manja sambil bagi flying kiss*

Mimpi

Ish.. lupa pulak nak cite padahal cite ni la rasanya paling hangat sepanjang minggu nih.



I had a dream last night. Like, freaking weird maaannnnn. Ok, it goes like this.


I can't exactly remember the plot of my dream (siap berplot gitew haaa), but all I could remember, I was being followed by some kind of hantu keliwon like that. She was wearing dark clothing with her eyes, strikingly red. She just followed me around, like, watching my back. And here comes the worst part...


I knew that thing was following me but I was NOT scared at all. Like, bangga lagik ada la dalam mimpi aku tu.



Adakah ini....


maksudnya....


AKU DAH JADIK SYAITOOONNNNNIIIRRAAAJJJIIIIMMMMMMM?!!!!


*bunyi petir sabung menyabung*

Weekend Getaway

Another Saturday spent together. This time, it was more laid back and relax than the first outing. Lunch, strolled around at the Super GT International Series at the Pyramid New Wing, spent 300 bucks at a DVD shop (HE did!), had ABCs because it was too effin' hot, another round of massage because the gedik side of me said, "adeh... lenguh siot kaki". Hehe.


It was sweet.


So, Gayah. Persetankan (hamek kau persetan katanya) dengan his plan of migrating. Until it happens, you are going to suck it aaaalllllll in.


Literally and figuratively.


Heh.


Ok. That was Saturday. My Sunday was spent melalak sampai nak pecah anak tekak. After what felt like centuries, I went karaoke-ing with MisJay and MisFiz. I screamed my lung out to Joan Jet, No Doubt, The Cranberries (A MUST), Bryan Adams, Sheila Majid, Gloria Estefan...


The next hour after the session, tetiba rasa aku ada adam's apple. Sakit siyal tekak.


All in all, it was a funfair weekend I say. How was yours?

Crying is good, even when it's done alone

I had a good cry last night. I was practically bawling on my sheets. It was tiring and messy. What's with the hiccup and the liquid running from your nose, but at least, it made me feel... lighter.


I started sobbing because I missed my ma. I missed her soothing voice while reciting the Quran. I missed her wisdom words in lecturing me. And the bawling started when I suddenly craved for her paru sambal. I was practically said out loud in between sobs, MAAAAAAA.. ORAAANNGGGG NAK MAKAN PARU SAMBAAALLLLLLL HUUUWWAAAAAAA like that. The image of her paru filled with super duper spicy reddish sambal kept flashing over my head. Cruel I tell you!


Then, when the craving subsided, I started crying for the death of my heart. I missed my heart dearly and deeply. I yearned for the feeling of being alive. I craved for the wanting and needing of someone. Life without heart is ugly.


And yes, there was a slight pang of missing him as I cried my heart out last night.


I was almost running out of my Kleenex when suddenly, I cried again because I was hungry.


Heh.





Ni kalau mak aku tau aku melalak pasal lapar ni confirm kena makan penyapu.

Hari ini dalam sejarah

Today, 21st May 2009, approximately 845am, Cik Gayah was found rammaging her kitchen, peeling off onions and garlics. She was frantically blended all in as she did not have enough time to menumbuk-numbuk the things.


By 9am, Cik Gayah quickly put on her office attire. Forget mascara, forget lipstick. No time, no time she mumbled to herself.



By 1005am, she happily opened her tupperware. As she was about to dig in, her Chief passed her by.



"You cook?"


"Yeap," she grin.


Without even asking for permission, he just took a spoon of the rice and ate it.


*chew chew gulp*


"Your garam tertinggal dalam kuali ke?"



HUUUUWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Takmo masak lagik sampai 2069!!

First time Gayah tak suka orang cakap dia lost weight..

Conversation around noon yesterday as we were on the way rammaging 3 shopping complexes in a day.



Jazzabelle - kakak, have you like, lost weight?


Gayah - hoyaayyyy!! hik. ntah ek.. never notice pun.


Jazzabelle - bontot ko dah makin kecik la..


Gayah - *gasp* WHHHAAATTTTTTT?!!! *pegang bontot*


Jazzabelle - serious!! jeans kau dah tak montok gitew kat situ. this is the jeans we bought at DP kan?


Gayah - HUUWWAAAAA!! that is like, my ONLY ASSet!! how can it shrrriiinnnnkkkkk?!!!



Apakah petua untuk kembali mendapatkan ASSet montok?

Is he for real?

He cancelled the movie. Expected.


But what I didn't expect was, his gesture in making up to the cancelled plan!


First, a lavish lunch at Ole Ole Bali. Then, a 3 hour cardio exercise at Pyramid (this statement I believe, only the shopaholics would understand, ey). Ended with 60 mins of foot massage at Touches De Siam.


Pitam Gayah.


Too good to be true dah nih.


*gostan kejap*

Time for Gayah to gloat

What are the chances when both your bosses gave the same exact compliment on your dressing today at a different time?



Boss #2: You look cute la today. Looks like you've lost few years...



Chief: You look cute. Love that combination red white and pink on you.



Ahhhhhh...

Updated: The chances are: compliments weren't free. Kena buat kopi laa.. rokok aku kena pau laa.. Hampeh!!!

The Rush

Do you still remember the feeling of the 'first time' with that special someone? That adrenaline rush when he called you, or when he asked you out, or the simple smile and the wink? It sure sends shivers to your spine ain't it?


I had that feeling last night. When he asked me out for a movie this weekend. Can't remember how good it feels like to have that butterfly in the stomach thingy again.


Oh well, enjoy it while it lasts Gayah.


*jalan lompat2 ala Alice in Wonderland*

Swim Swim

I have not been swimming for the past 7 months since Ramadhan last year. First, of course I stopped due to Ramadhan. A month after that, it was the Seattle weather. Then, it was just plain lazy.


Yesterday, after realizing that my fat butt is getting FATTERRRR, I decided it's time to drag this fat ass back to what used to be my sanctuary, the pool. Plus, with this kind of heat, where else would you wanna be than berendam in a huge pool kan...


I quickly found my so-called groove 5 minutes into the pool. Sakan la kononnya kan, I did 4 laps non-stop. The moment I reached the edge of the pool after that 4 laps, mengucap terus maakkkkk!! Hamek kau!!!


Terus demam mak smalam. Ni ler poyo namanya.


Haih.

Oblivious is not good when you are caught red-handed..

I have always been an oblivious person to my surroundings. If I'm in a shopping complex, train, or simply walking around, I would just mind my own business and look straight ahead, usually to an object rather than faces. I would only look at people if they are blocking my way or when they are being annoying. It may sound cool, but most of the time, this action of mine cause me trouble.


Like last Thursday night.


Ibu Adam was in town with of course, the hero. I took 'mc' that day with an excuse, "having horrible migrain boss, can't even sit let alone stand up" kind of excuse to Chief. I guess, after 7 years of hearing that kind of excuse, his reply was short and simple and sweet... "Ok". Heh. Well, there's a story of kantol besar-besaran with the Chief, but that would be another day tales.


Anyway, that night, all of us including Jazabelle and the bf headed to Kg Baru for ayam penyet session. After melantaking and stuffing our faces with the delicious super duper spicy of ayam penyet, the smokers in the house, that's Jazabelle and me, went outside to have our usual fag after eating. Again, oblivious as I was, I happily huffed and puffed the ciggie away.. looked at the cars and the bikes and the shops around me.


15 minutes later, we were getting ready to leave. I was putting on my shoes when I turned my head to the left and saw my uncle's brother and his family sitting just 5 feet away from where I was. I froze.


"SHIT!!"


"What??" asked Jazabelle with her curious face.


"Adik pakcik aku!! FUCK!!"


"Mana??"


"Yang duduk kat table tepi ni..." I pointed at their direction with my mouth all the while hiding my face at the little tembok.


"Kau... diorang ni baru je masuk masa kita gi smoke tadik tau. Kau tak perasan ke?!!"


"OWH FUUUCCKKKKKK!!!"


I sped my way out of the restaurant without looking back.


Penah rasa urat perut tergeliat?


Sheez.

Kemaluan yang tak mampu dibendung...

I was caught by my English Police a.k.a Chief on my room-to-rent advertisement posted on our office lifts.






Chief: I saw your ad in the lift.


Me: *sengih*


Chief: Your ad says, "the whole house is equipped with astro, tv, washing machine, bla bla..." Seriously?? WHOLE house?? Your room pun ada washing machine ke???


Me: *sentap*


OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!


Paiseh sial!!

The Snobbish Me

To the 3 people who dropped comments on my previous entry, I thank you.


But it won't be approved.


No reason. No justification.


It is afterall, my blog kan?




Aku memang suka carik publisiti murahan.

If this is the end of 12 years friendship, then let it be.

"Alicia (pergghhh, nama nak alicia je kau Gayah eh!!), ko boleh terus berckp, slow talk, atau tegur aku terus kalau aku ni tak betul, bukan dgn menelefon bercerita pada rakan. itu erti sebenar sahabat. aku lebih appreciate mcm tu. gud nite."


That was a text message sent to me on 6th of May at around 12 midnight by an acquaintance. We used to be good friends 12 years ago. Until recently. Hence, the acquaintance. Well, let's call this acquaintance of mine, Mr X.


Mr X and I go waaayyyy back when dreadlocks were the sex symbol of boys among girls, when studios and bundles were the places to be and bus terminal was the coolest place to be seen and heard. We may not be the blood brother sister thing, but we were in a same group day in day out for the whole 3 years I was there.


Growing up after the college years, we kept in touch through the beauty of world wide web - the ym. We did meet up but not as often as before. More like once in a year when our path crossed. But still, we kept ourselves updated with who's doing what, who's doing who - the works. Of course, throughout the years of just chatting over ym, we had our disagreements in soooo many things. I guess, that's the downfall of 'chatting'. You mean well when you express something through your writing, but the other person may not read it according to your tone. We fought. Most of the times, got emotional over nothing. But it didn't take us long to forget about the arguments and move on.


Last year, Mr X had a failed relationship, same timing when I had mine. But, cupid was being kind to him. He found what I could say, his right partner. I knew this new girl of him (let's call her Mrs X) during the years where, like I said, bus terminal was the coolest place to be seen and heard. Knowing my stuck up attitude, it was never easy for me to get along with girls. That's why I only have Jazabelle and Ibu Adam as my bestest and ONLY girlfriends (Gibber, you are on a different league of Gugurls). But with this Mrs X, I found it easy for me to blend in because she's cool. So, when Mr X informed me about him meeting her and stuff, I encouraged him to go for it. Because if I were to be honest, I could actually see them together in many years ahead.


Like any other normal couple, of course there would be ups and downs. Happiness is not easy. You have to work on it to make it work. I met Mrs X recently, for dinner. She told me about her lover quarrel. It was devastating and sad. Yes, she said not to tell anyone. But looking at her and I "thought" I wanted to be a friend and helped them, I told another friend of ours who is the closest and nearest to Mr X to talk him out of it.


Expected, Mr X couldn't take it as a man. We all forgotten he has a mentality of a 5 year old sad 'depressed' kid. We thought, after one year of that sad broken relationship, he is now a wiser man to understand that what past is past and not ALL women came from the same blender. Boy, how wrong we were.


Now, I soooo wanted to call him that night and gave him my 2 cents, but I wouldn't want to give him that satisfaction. Knowing him, he would be too chicken to answer my call. So, I told myself, why not be like him? Let's reply this without having a conversation.


So, here it goes.





GROW UP! This excuse of yours that you were a victim and you are not going to repeat history therefore you have the right to be paranoid is getting sad, lame and boring.


Thank you.


Oh. And gud nite too.

Like a true bimbo

Is this some kind of come-lets-screw-up-Gayah-by-giving-her-hard-time-in-everything week??? Like, SERIOUSLY!!! First, it was LHDN. And today, the screamyx is like enjoying itself by making me scream my head off looking at the fucked up connection.


Astaga. Kan dah mencarut!!!


How to work like this with the connection playing pee-ka-boo every 15 seconds? How to chat? How to blog? How to facebooking like this? Hah?! This is like, the worst depression moment I've ever had maannn. Like, I can't focus. Like, seriously!!


Heh.

The Helping Hand

"I'm losing my grip these days. I can't focus. I came in with no motivation at all. I did some work half way and then totally lost it. I find difficulty in waking up every morning..."


He said with a frustrated look in his eyes. I didn't say anything when he poured his heart out. Frankly, I didn't know what to say. The last time I've seen him in this situation was 6 years ago. But at that time, I just saw changes in him physically. He never talked to me those days because we weren't this close yet.


"I need your help. You are the only person in my life that I can talk to,"


"What do you want me to do?"


"Be there for me. Help push me when you see me drifting apart. Help yank me out of this,"


His eyes broke my heart. It's sad to see someone so solid breaking apart.


He needs me now. If by pushing him can save him from this heartache, then I will, by all means push him to his grave, I mean to his senses.





Macam setan kan nak tolak orang masuk kubur?!! Heh.

So much of short sketch... Gua panas ati nih!!

I'd like to think that my temper these days is pretty much under control. I do not easily get ticked off and even if I did, I would choose to just keep quiet or walk away from the situation. However, today, LHDN has managed to bring out the beast in me and made me exploded in front of 12 staff and 20 other waiting customers.

Last month, on 16th of April, I joined their so-called taklimat on using e-pcb, their online system. I remember clearly their reason on using this:

"This system will help our work smoother as we do not have to do double entry work on your information,"

Fine. The system was easy to use, and with the thought of "making" their life easier, I used the system to deduct the PCB this month. Today, I went there with the printed copy from the system, a cheque and waited for 20 people before my turn. When I finally got to the counter, the lady behind it said,

"Maaf puan. Puan salah borang ni.. kita tak pakai borang ni lah,"

DAH LA PANGGIL AKU PUAN!!

"Macamana bole salah kalau I print sendiri dari e-pcb website?!!"

She went inside, checked with her superior and came out 5 mins later to tell me that I have to go to the 1st floor to make payment. Hati gua dah terbakar by that time dah. Dengan muka kental, I went up. Well, at least, it was lesser people compared to downstairs, I said to myself.

I've waited for 3 mins before my turn. Again, the lady said the same thing - I gave a wrong form. And this time, she gave me the manual form for me to fill up again. THAT my friend, takes the cake.

"You asked me to use the system to make YOUR life easier. Now you tell me, how does this system help me in making MY life easier when I have to do this TWICE?? You gotta be kidding me?!!!!"

Right at that time, I noticed even the stupid machine that kept repeating "1082 kaunter bla bla bla" was turned off, and I could actually hear all heads turned to me. But muka tetap remain ketat ok.

After my form being passed around and listening myself repeating my issue to 2 different people, I finally got my receipt 15 mins later. I called up the bos who handled this e-pcb, went up to 10th floor and gave him my 2 cents. Well, more like 1000 bucks punye membebel dah ni.

And you know what was his excuse?

"Maaf puan. Mungkin masa kita bagi training kat staff, diorang tak salin the URL.."

KEPALA JIMBIT KAU BERTERABURRRR!!!!

HAH!!

And what's with PUAN thingy with this govt body??? Muka aku muka puan ke?!!!!

Mama

It's my ma's birthday today. My solid rock lady is 56 year old. Just 15 days after me old man's 56th birthday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PN. FUZIAH!!


I'm proud to be your daughter.

Kepala Bulat

"I'm looking for a boyfriend lah. Not that I REALLY want it though. I'm just bored. I need someone that I can argue with... fight with... It's been a year now,"


"Well, why don't we give it a shot? I'm single, you're single. Let's see how it goes..."


Pause.







Guess I'm attached now.

Hello.

We meet again.


;)